A Bad Case of Nerves and a Need for Change

I never thought I'd say it, but I'm really looking forward to a change. It's a scorcher in Seattle today (90 degrees) and I would be melting if we didn't live in a basement. Those few unbearably hot days (for northwesterners) are about the only times that it is a plus to live in a basement apartment. I'm tired of the lack of light, the pitiful ventilation and the constant stream of noises coming from feet and children overhead. I love those children but I'd like to love them on equal ground, not underground. I'm ready to live somewhere else--a place that will hopefully be our last rental! Although Seattle has grown on me, I look forward to a more slow-paced environment.

Luckily for us that change is within our grasp. Ricky set out for Eugene this morning to go to his meeting with "the partners" of the firm he will hopefully get a job with. His meeting is tomorrow afternoon and we are nervous. I'm sure he's more nervous than I am but I struggle with not being able to have a part in a situation in which the outcome affects my life so drastically. I'm sitting here at home with Lucy and counting the hours until he calls tomorrow to tell me whether or not we will get to move back to Eugene. We tried not to get our hopes up but it didn't work. Our hopes are sky high and our stomachs are in our throats. Hold your breath for news!

Another reason that I so desperately want to return to the promised land (Willamette Valley) is my need for a support system. We need to have more than two friends in the city where we live. If we really needed something who could we call for help? The friends we do have here are in a different stage of life. They are at a place in their lives where they need our support but can't necessarily be relied upon to support other people. If I were in Eugene and needed help I would have a long list of people I felt comfortable calling. If that didn't work, family is only an hour away in Salem. But here, if those two friends bail on us or are too busy to help, we're shit out of luck. We've made it work this year but it definitely wouldn't work if we had kids.

I guess this is just another thing to add to my list of reasons why I am actually glad that we had this Seattle adventure: we learned how absolutely important it is to have a support system. If you have time tonight, please send up some extra prayers for Ricky and cross your fingers that tomorrow will bring us some good news.