Imperfect

I was on a low last week. It happens to the best of us I'm afraid. I knew things weren't really right with me but in a break down with Ricky on Thursday night I acknowledged the depression that had been eating away at me. The inability to fall asleep at night and then sleeping until 12:30 pm should have been a dead giveaway but I had been ignoring it.

We talked through things and decided that I needed some motivation. Playing the housewife really takes an emotional toll on my sense of worth that I apparently have a hard time dealing with. So, I'm throwing myself head first into art. Yes, ART. I have been hoarding a rolladex of ideas and images in my head for many moons but lacked the courage to expose them, until now.

It's a long and complicated process but my goal is to design fabrics and then use the fabrics to make other things. I'm feeling really inspired and motivated right now and I'm trying to ride that for as long as I can. More details to come regarding my eventual success or failure in theis endeavor.

Meanwhile I am learning to accept and even embrace imperfection. I'm learning to look at a would-be flaw in a new light and to love the quirks of my work. I continually have to widen my eyes, walk away, come back, and then widen my eyes again. It's proving therapeutic and enjoyable. Wish me luck.